Rush Limbaugh, Michelle Obama and ribs

I love watching a TV show after dinner when, during commercials, my local late-night news anchor gives me an annoying preview of what will be covered later, teasing me with something shocking and "how dare they!" and then saying, "more at 11" before giving me the stink-eye. Usually I ignore the unusually perky newsperson and attempt for ratings but last night I was intrigued ... Rush Limbaugh attacks Michelle Obama for her dietary choices?

Food fight!

First thought -- what is Rush tipping the scales at these days? 300? 350? Guess those fad diets didn't work.

Second thought -- didn't Michelle Obama plant an organic garden at the White House and install bee hives for official dinners, etc.? She started the Let's Move! movement to help fight childhood obesity -- get those husky kids out and about, eating healthier and exercising more!

So what's the beef Rush? Apparently, Michelle is a hypocrite. On a recent vacation in Vail, Colo. with her daughters, Michelle "feasted on ribs," as Rush put it, when she should be feasting on "roots, berries and tree bark."

Rush said, "She is a hypocrite. Leaders are supposed to lead. If we are supposed to go out and eat nothing, if we are supposed to eat roots, berries and tree bark, show us how."

No wonder your diets failed Rush! I tried a lot of diets over the years -- SouthBeach, Atkins, SlimFast, starvation -- and learned the best way, with the highest likelihood of success in the long term, is to eat in moderation. Michelle Obama never told families to eat strict diets, she told them to incorporate healthier foods into their diet and exercise more. Everything in moderation! No wonder women have poor body image -- you must eat roots, berries and tree bark FOREVER!

Well, since Rush isn't too good with the whole diet thing, obviously from his trip to the hospital after a dangerously unhealthy fad diet, let me explain it in terms of a drug addict -- instead of quitting cold turkey and not taking any painkillers, take a pain killer only on a special occasion or when you actually need pain relief.

Rush also commented, "I'm trying to say our first lady does not project the image of women that you might see on the cover of the Sports Illustrated swimsuit issue or of a woman Alex Rodriguez might date every six months, or what have you."

Geez Rush. Did Michelle ever try to promote this image of women or that she, herself, was a swimsuit model? What are you talking about? Are you still doing drugs? Maybe a couple pills to dull the pain, get you through the day, is that right big guy? One turns to three turns to five turns to ... what was I talking about again? Pass me a cigar and my microphone!

I hope the people listening to your high-rated show tune in to laugh at you because, honey, you are an idiot. Michelle Obama is a tall and average sized woman who works out and promotes healthy eating and exercise. She isn't a swimsuit model, no one ever said she was or was trying to promote swimsuit models or A-Rod arm candy. Michelle promotes people being healthy, not unreachable standards as a swimsuit model or the opposite as a overweight or obese individual. She promotes having dessert or a plate of ribs as a treat, not a staple to your diet. She's part of the solution, not the problem.

According to the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention, 34% of adults ages 20 and older are obese as of 2007-08, a number that has grown and continues to grow. Also, 34% of adults ages 20 and older are overweight. You do the math. The numbers also include:

* ages 12 to 19 -- 18% obese

* ages 6 to 11 -- 20% obese

* ages 2 to 5 -- 10% obese

The terms obese and overweight are determined by BMI (body mass index) which takes into account height and weight. Although it does not measure body fat (which means body builders, athletes and muscular people can have inaccurate BMIs), for the most part it's pretty accurate. We aren't dealing with pro-athletes, we are dealing with the Average Joe Americana.

As much as Shakira's "hips don't lie," these numbers don't lie. So Rush, what should America do with this disturbing growing trend? Oh wait, you don't care. You don't give answers to problems or promote steps in a positive direction. Instead, you sit on your high horse (a desk with a microphone), pop pain pills, eat shit and put others down. Maybe search for wife #5 in the recent issue of Sports Illustrated -- cover model Irina Shayk is a turbo hottie! Maybe take another stab at Michael J. Fox for the side affects of his Parkinson's disease. Screw Parkinson's, why not find another "disease" to attack -- you attacked obesity already so why not move to cancer? Lung disease? Diabetes?

Or, Rush, you could pick on a member of the opposite political party so you stay relevant. Stay in the news, stay controversial. Keep spreading the hate even if at least half of it makes no sense whatsoever. Your followers don't care why, they want direction! You don't believe half of what you say anyway because you are a parody of yourself, a character playing a game for ratings so people like me get so mad we write a really long blog about you and then at the end feel stupid for wasting so much time on you and your comments because that's what you wanted in the first place!

It's people like you who take advantage of the simple-minded, the people willing to listen and follow your advice and opinions with blind, open faith, it's people like you who made America a hated joke across the world. You are advancing hate, disunion and simplemindedness. Shame on you!