Lindsay Lohan is trending on the Yahoo homepage again -- i.e. she spiraled further into chaos. When it comes to the ole gal, she's never in the news for something positive.
What's it this time, you ask? Well, well, well, lookie what we have here! Ms. Lohan was banned from the Chateau Marmont because she failed to pay $46,000 in unpaid charges. Well, $46,350.04 if you really wanna know. One may argue she was living in the hotel for two months (47 days), so it's natural she may rack up some charges. But $46K?
Let's go to the video tape! Her itemized bill, obtained by TMZ, includes a long list of charges, with the most juicy items being:
Minibar expenses -- $3,145.07 ($502.43 was charged on July 1 alone -- some party Linds! This ain't no Pitbull ho-tel, mo-tel, Holiday Inn!)
Cigarettes -- $686 (not surprising considering her lovely, goddess-like voice)
Chateau candle -- $100 (I don't know about you, but I get pissed when I'm at the grocery store and they're hawking those fancy, schmancy Yankee candles for $15. $100? No dice.)
One-time laundry charge -- $386.50 -- perhaps a special cigarette-ash-stain-release was needed.
Also included were gems like the June 24 room service charges of $389.87. For that kind of charge, I want more than food!
Part of me thinks she was extravagant in her spending (somewhere Suzie Orman's tears are falling into off-brand tissues), another part of me thinks this Chateau Marmont inflates their charges for items like tiny bottles of vodka and Parliament lights.
Luckily Lindsay was recently cleared from her latest jewelry heist charges so at least she's got that off her plate. Sigh. Can I start a Lindsay Lohan Death Pool (if there's not already one active)? I say by the end of 2014 she will be no longer with us. What say you? Extra credit for cause of death.
Now, I know what some of you are thinking ... lame post Vendetta! Yeah, Lindsay's a screw up. She's an easy celebrity target no longer worthy of blogposts, news articles, Entertainment Tonight segments. She needs to be sent to the glue factory! She's basically Kim Kardashian.
That's where I disagree. After a few vodka tonics, possibly followed by a couple sweet, sweet glasses of vino, I ventured into my King-sized bed, found the clicker, and ignited the soft glow of electric sex. What to my wondering eyes did appear? DirecTv had a movie I enjoyed -- "Mean Girls." Hooray! So, I turned that sucker on and was instantly reminded why I have a soft spot for ole Lindsay.
What a great movie! What an attractive girl! What an actress! No, she wasn't Meryl Streep, but who is? She's enjoyable, nice to look at -- what more do you want?
It's sad she spiraled into drugs, alcohol, theft and chaos. Kim Kardashian? She was thrust into fame because her dead daddy's well-known and she put out a sex tape with Ray-J. Kim Kardashian: Superstar was nothing and will never amount to anything aside from self-made drama, whorish clothing and dating non-white celebrities. Star on the Hollywood Walk of Fame my ass.
I rest my case.
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